Perspective

It has been a doozy of 24 hours! Thursday was pretty fantastic because all my clients didn't show or cancelled. In another time (a month ago) that would stress me out to no end, or upset me, but now I have so much to do that hasn't been done since November, I had a rock star day of playing catch up. :) As an added bonus, sushi lunch. :)

Henley was great, as always, when we got home and David fed her some yogurt to appease her immediate hunger when we get home. She takes her bath, goes to bed, etc. We finally get confirmation of the babysitter for tonight (first date in HOW LONG?!) The missionaries stopped by and hung out for about an hour. David played us the new song he 's working on (AWESOME!) and the missionaries went on their way. While the missionaries were there, I stepped on the heel of one of my shoes and got a considerable sized divot out of my own fleshy heel. Pain does not even begin to describe that!

I read our book club book (The Help by Kathryn Stockett, I think that's her name) and am so close to done. I'm realistic in my expectations of reading while we're in Arizona. Not going to happen. I think we got to sleep about midnight. :P

I wake to Henley crying around 5:00. Foot still throbbing, me limping around getting things ready to pull her out of her crib. I should interrupt and say that this is atypical behavior. Usually she is up at 6 or 6:30. Usually she will willingly roll over when I ask her to lay on her back so I can change her diaper. Usually she gives me a kiss when she wakes up.

By the time I've reached her door, she has given up on calling for "mama" and is resorting to "dada". This is important because very often she calls David "mama" as well, but with a different syllabic inflection. I think only I can tell the difference. In any case, she is soaked, the diaper leaked. She is screaming, inconsolable, will not let me change her. I pick her up (still soaking wet) to try to calm her and she arches her back and screams even louder. I put her back in the crib where she stops on her hands and knees to prevent pajama removal. I successfully peel off her pajama pants, but that is not the end. She won't let me remove the diaper and stands to prevent any semblance of cooperation (all while still crying). I pick her up, sans diaper, and bring her into the living room in an attempt to hypnotize her with Tangled and get a diaper on and her wet pajama shirt off. Minimal luck. I eventually maneuver to get the diaper strapped on, but it looks like she put it on herself. Oh, and the milk. She got her milk. A little snuggles, but they don't last long, or maybe just not long enough, and the crying and arching of the back resumes. I look in the kitchen and quickly realize why today is the day David is grocery shopping. Milk, gone. Yogurt, gone. Eggs, gone. Sometimes Henley will eat dry cereal, but not often. I attempt to appease her with Cheerios and feel terribly guilty at the realization that all she had for dinner at 5:00 the night previous was a cup of yogurt. No wonder I'm fighting with her at 5 AM!

I'm getting desperate by this point. The screaming and inconsolability is wearing on me. Oh, and she just took off her own diaper. I decide that a shower or as we call it a ba-shower is the cure. She allows me to take off her pajama shirt and she is now running around naked. Usually when I turn the shower on, or anyone else, she runs and demands to join. Not today. I have to chase her down, grab her and put her in the shower with myself. Screaming, arching her back trying desperately to get the curtain open and out of the bath. She cried the entire time. ENTIRE time.

She doesn't want a clean diaper, refuses water, continues to scream. I get the diaper on and go to my room to get myself ready for work. David is awake (it's 7 now) and I recruit him and she calms down immediately. I get very close to breaking down emotionally because she is totally fine now that she has had half a minute of daddy time. She lets me get her dressed, put on shoes, everything without a complaint. She is laughing and smiling and great. In my mind I was exhausted from the two hour fight with her and really wanting a break and then I remembered what today is. I remembered Clay in his coffin and I was suddenly grateful for a screaming fighting child that was definitely breathing.

Oh perspective, why do you do this to me?