Inside of Hope

I believe that we are a culture that is addicted to hope.

I continue to contemplate patterns of behavior, why we as a culture behave in a certain way. At times, as a therapist and emergency worker, it becomes my job to prevent someone from "giving up". I can be enthused about it when it is a young kid that just doesn't have perspective. When it is someone that repeatedly drains resources, whatever they might be. We have clients that cannot fill out their own paperwork, live off of disability, have run-ins with the law, use our taxes to sustain themselves, and call us out at 2 in the morning that they have something to live for when they often feel paranoid, see things that aren't there, have voices telling them horrible things, and I, someone who cannot relate to many of those symptoms, have to convince them there is purpose. Some days I think I'm a Darwinist.

Then there is the other part of me. The part of me that knows Heavenly Father has a plan for us. That knows the worth of souls is great. That knows there is a little bonus for enduring to the end. I want to reduce pain, turmoil, suffering, in whatever way I can. To improve relationships and renew hope.

There are kids who have parents that appear to neglect their needs. Parents who are addicted to drugs, alcohol, drama, themselves, anything to distract from parenting. Adults ordered to be in treatment because of court obligations. They fight us the whole way through and then we have to convince them that they want something better than they have. Oftentimes we try to convince them that the way we live our lives is better. Who is to say that it is? Who decides what is the best way to live?

Because some kids have TVs and others don't. Some have bedtimes, curfews, vegetables, religion and others don't. Maybe the kids who have parents that don't notice are better off because if their parents noticed, they would be abused. Maybe the kids who get to run the streets are still able to enjoy the freedom we had as kids to explore and expand our curiosity instead of the kids forced to stay home and learn to be afraid of everything.

I continue to have this battle in my profession. It often should come down to teaching our clients to notice their inner voice and know what is best for them by being aware. Maybe I need to teach myself first.